[Mind] How do you deal with this?

看板EngTalk (全英文聊天)作者 (queen)時間14年前 (2012/01/09 00:49), 編輯推噓5(5023)
留言28則, 5人參與, 最新討論串1/1
I'm currently in a relationship with a wonderful guy that I love. Even though he doesn't go to the best university in Taiwan but I still love him. He's what I look for in a guy. He's responsible, has a sense of humor, polite, mature, respects me and much, much more. I don't normally tell my parents when I'm in a relationship because they never seem to really care about what I think. Lately, my mother has been saying the most bizzare things and I can't stand it anymore. This is why I'm here posting this. A few students from NTU visited my city and mom was their tour guide. After her first day encountering with them, she kept telling me how wonderful they were. They were so polite, smart, and you know... all the positive good stuff. After all, what bad stuff can you say about people that you barely know? What was worse was that she literally tried hooking me up with some NTU kid. All I was thinking the whole time was "What the hell? This is out of nowhere." I think my mother should know better. I couldn't stand her repeately telling me who to and not to date. Soon after, she found out that I have a boyfriend and she was pretty upset. She's seen him once but she doesn't quite remember what he looks like. Again, she doesn't seem to care about my friends or what I tell her, that's why she doesn't remember. The things I tell her about my friends or whatever that's happening in my life,she will not remember. She can't even match up my closest friends names with their faces. Pretty upsetting if you ask me. I know this is mean to say about my own mother but she is sort of shallow. I don't communicate with her well because she's short-tempered and stubborn. I'm usually quite when I'm around her, I let her speak and tell me whatever she wants. I love her deeply and what she tells me do really affect me. I have my lovable boyfriend on one hand, and a mother who wants the best for me on the other. What she thinks is best for me might not be the best. How would she know that NTU guy is the right guy for me? What if he's just some ramdon abusive guy who plays around all day? Seriously! Who knows? Why the hell would I want to be friends with someone just because he studies at NTU? I really want my mother to get to know my boyfriend better before juding him. Boyfriend thinks it's not the right time yet because we're currently in a long distance relationship and he'll be serving the army this June. He thinks it's best to meet the parents after the army. How do I communicate with a mother that only wants what she thinks is best for me? How do I communicate with someone who doesn't really listen to what others say? I want help :( -- ※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc) ◆ From: 111.255.90.253

01/09 03:47, , 1F
Maybe you just have to bring your boyfriend to your
01/09 03:47, 1F

01/09 03:48, , 2F
mom, anyway, I believe there is no best way, because
01/09 03:48, 2F

01/09 03:48, , 3F
you can not control others behavior. Good luck!
01/09 03:48, 3F
We've decided to meet the parents after his military service. I guess I just envy mothers that could talk to their daughters and support what they want. My girlfriends' moms are all very supportive of them and I want this as well. It's okay, time will tell, like always.

01/09 19:25, , 4F
honestly, your mom does care, she just don't know how
01/09 19:25, 4F

01/09 19:25, , 5F
to get into your life...
01/09 19:25, 5F

01/09 19:26, , 6F
the thing about relationship is, it's never a
01/09 19:26, 6F

01/09 19:26, , 7F
one-sided game, and also, it's not a win-win game
01/09 19:26, 7F

01/09 19:26, , 8F
what you should do is to find a way that does best
01/09 19:26, 8F

01/09 19:27, , 9F
for both your mom and your bf, wish you the best :)
01/09 19:27, 9F
I know she cares, and, of course, she does! I just don't think she's loving me the right way but who am I to say this, am I loving her the way she wants? Guess not. Thanks, you guys. I was very upset last night but I'm okay now. → huayuyu530:how old are you?? it seems u are not too old if 01/09 19:27

01/09 19:28, , 10F
your bf is doing military service this year
01/09 19:28, 10F
Yes, we're pretty young, still in uni.

01/09 23:20, , 11F
In fact, if you can't communicate well with your own
01/09 23:20, 11F

01/09 23:20, , 12F
mother, how can you expect she will be able to
01/09 23:20, 12F

01/09 23:21, , 13F
understand you? Though it is a great pity...
01/09 23:21, 13F

01/09 23:22, , 14F
It may not easy to let her acknowledge your thoughts;
01/09 23:22, 14F

01/09 23:22, , 15F
gradually, I believe your smiles and confidence, and all
01/09 23:22, 15F

01/09 23:24, , 16F
the positive perspectives you hold will manifest for you
01/09 23:24, 16F

01/09 23:26, , 17F
happiness and delightful life you are leading, as well
01/09 23:26, 17F

01/09 23:28, , 18F
as the genial and bright manners in which you are
01/09 23:28, 18F

01/09 23:30, , 19F
treating everything or everyone around you, which is a
01/09 23:30, 19F

01/09 23:31, , 20F
convincing evidence and testimony that it is one of the
01/09 23:31, 20F

01/09 23:33, , 21F
most magnificent spectaculars that surrounds you and
01/09 23:33, 21F

01/09 23:34, , 22F
enriches your mind.
01/09 23:34, 22F

01/09 23:40, , 23F
It may not "be" easy... (the fourth line)XD
01/09 23:40, 23F
Thank you. She tells me things from her experience. I don't want to prove her wrong(parents can be wrong as well, just not all the time, haha) Sometimes it really does get annoying. I've had a rough time communicating with her for 20 some years now. I only realised this as I grew older. ※ 編輯: queenlv 來自: 111.255.67.14 (01/10 02:24)

01/10 18:03, , 24F
Maybe you can try to break the myth that your mom
01/10 18:03, 24F

01/10 18:04, , 25F
has about make friends with ntu, try to let her
01/10 18:04, 25F

01/10 18:04, , 26F
understand that the generation is changing, we must
01/10 18:04, 26F

01/10 18:05, , 27F
move foward. Be patient=)
01/10 18:05, 27F

01/10 21:51, , 28F
ha, dont' worry, i'm even younger than you are LOL
01/10 21:51, 28F
文章代碼(AID): #1F2SakmU (EngTalk)
文章代碼(AID): #1F2SakmU (EngTalk)