[Talk] Being honest, not negative

看板EngTalk (全英文聊天)作者kyger (nobody)時間19年前 (2006/06/05 00:45)推噓1(1推 0噓 1→)

留言2則, 2人參與討論串1/2 (看更多)

Last Friday, I've got this new pair of pants and I wore it to work. My co-workers did like it. One of them even asked me to get one for her because it's nice and inexpensive. However, once I got back home, my mom just said to me: " Can you dress like that to work? You look fat and your big fat belly is just hanging right out of you pants!" I was kinda pissed off. It's pouring outside, and I got soaking wet, back from the stupid work. The first thing you could ever say to me is that I am fat, which you have said a million times before. I can't believe this! What's wrong with you? ---- We two are never close to each other even though we are the only two females in the house. Maybe it's because she's always niggling around, over and over about everything, every little thing. She even called me a dirty a girl for not wearing bra at home when I was younger. I don't understand why she has to take everythin the way she does. Some people do love her and get along well with her, me excluded. I don't know if this is her or me. I just don't get it. As I can rememebr, she never says anything nice to me. She's that kind of traditional mother that believes in all the so-called "traditional Chinese virtues for women." She does maintain the house affairs well and sometimes do nice things, like buying me clothes, but her words are just too difficult to handle with. I can't understand why she says the bitter things. Words can hurt you, really bad. I know people always think "oh, we're are family (or friends ) so I can be honest with you. blahblah." But being honest doesn't mean you have be negative. Especially for Chinese people, we don't give compliments as much as we do give critics. Once all you hear is critism and negative opinions, the mean words can really beat you down and take away your confidence. You can say it in a better way, like "I like you dress, but it will look better if you can do blahblah..", instead of " oh my god, the dress is terrible, where did you get it?" You call this hypocrisy? To me, it's because I care. I care about the ones I love, the ones I'm living with. I wnat make it work, so I put something more in it. Do not kill with your words. Because words do hurt people. You've been there, and I've been there. -- ※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc) ◆ From: 61.62.210.129