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[履歷] 應屆畢業生英文自傳求批

看板Salary (工作職場)作者 (芹菜)時間11年前 (2015/04/04 18:15), 11年前編輯推噓15(15推 0噓 26→)
留言41則, 16人參與, 最新討論串1/2 (看更多)
各位大大們好，這是小妹第一次求批英文自傳，相信它仍有很大的修改空間， 煩請各位大大們不吝於指教。如果可以，請多用利用站內信給予任何建議 謝謝大家的耐心和願意幫助我的善心 個人學經歷背景： 國立大學財務金融研究所 欲應徵之職務： 儲備幹部 自傳履歷內容： Extends the deep respect to your industrious work, even you are very busy. Thanks to glance through my material. And hoped that it can open an opportunity and the success gate for me. My name is ooxx, Betty is my English name. I do a Master’s. degree in finance at National oo University and research on Fixed-Income security. The topic of my paper is ‘Information uncertainty and corporation bonds’ liquidity’. I choose to research fixed-income because its low volatility and it can take stable income. I believe that it will be helpful not only for my work in the future but my financial planning. I learned to be independent and helped to take care of my younger brother when I was a child. It makes me become a thoughtful, reliable, and down-to-earth person. That’s why I always be the leader in many groups. In 2010, I entered a contest which named World Economic Outlook Essay Competition with my friends. We had to organize three English papers and an English article in three hours, then presented them to judges. I used topics and abstracts of those paper to know the contest and let my teammates connect to the article. We spent two hours to organize them, and different from other teams we have more time to do analysis. We not only presented the information of those material but elaborate our conclusions. Then we got a silver medal. During the institute, because of classmates’ reliance and professors’ recognition I continue to hold the leader of the class when reelected, even been picked for assistant of EMBA program to solve all of those students’ problems. Of all assistant, they most favorite me. Whenever they need help, thy always find me to help deal. I'm not just an assistant, but their secretary. I also be administrative assistant in department of finance general office. Due to strong sense of responsibility, I don’t just finish my job, every time they have many works to do, I’m always ready to help to relieve their heavy workload. They tell me that I’m the most proactive assistant. For this reason I’ve worked here more than one year. Volleyball’s group mentality is the reason that I'm fanatic about this sport. Fighting with teammates and sharing the honor to each other are wonderful things for me. In college, I’ve been an event planner for annually beach volleyball activity many times. When I had different thinking from others, I tried to stand in others’ shoes and ask seniors for suggestions in order to solve the problem and make the following work be carried on smoothly. With my great specialized knowledge of finance and highly proactive, I am confident that I will fit management associate. It's been said, ‘Where there ’s a will, there’s the way!’ I believe that pressure can make me grow up, so I’m not afraid of meeting challenge. OOO Financial Holdings gives good opportunity and a series of well-designed training sessions to make freshmen become an excellent MA. Wish you can give me a chance to prove it. I am eager to be one of the programmers and I will pay attention to your firm's development as always, and express my sincerest wish. -- ※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc), 來自: 140.115.87.146 ※ 文章網址: https://www.ptt.cc/bbs/Salary/M.1428142526.A.ED6.html
推
04/04 19:22, , 1F
Wow!! I think you are a extraordinary prodigy!!!(>﹏
04/04 19:22, 1F
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04/04 19:22, , 2F
<)
04/04 19:22, 2F
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04/04 19:22, , 3F
建議花點錢請懂英文的朋友或業者大修，文法多處錯誤，
04/04 19:22, 3F
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04/04 19:23, , 4F
寫作風格也不符合求職自傳的要求。
04/04 19:23, 4F
推
04/04 19:24, , 5F
不過還滿厲害的!!
04/04 19:24, 5F
※ 編輯: a765112223 (140.115.87.146), 04/04/2015 19:51:11
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04/04 19:54, , 6F
先找人修正文法錯誤+1
04/04 19:54, 6F
推
04/04 19:56, , 7F
google translate 的嗎
04/04 19:56, 7F
我對寫英文的經驗不多，所以寫起來比較像是用中文思考在寫， 表達上面可能不那麼貼近實際英文的用法，請大大們舉個例子給我好嗎？ 文法應該怎麼修正呢？ ※ 編輯: a765112223 (140.115.87.146), 04/04/2015 20:04:33
推
04/04 20:06, , 8F
文法要修正是通篇要打掉重練 要加強英文寫作就不是一天了
04/04 20:06, 8F
推
04/04 20:08, , 9F
先用中文寫履歷
04/04 20:08, 9F
能不能多給一點例子？我比較知道應該怎麼去修改>_< ※ 編輯: a765112223 (140.115.87.146), 04/04/2015 20:10:12
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04/04 20:25, , 10F
段落從學位論文-->學術競賽--> 班代經歷-->系辦工讀-->
04/04 20:25, 10F
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04/04 20:26, , 11F
-->願為公司效力，鋪陳非常不順。
04/04 20:26, 11F
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04/04 20:27, , 12F
系辦工讀--> 運動賽事-->願為公司效力。
04/04 20:27, 12F
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04/04 20:29, , 13F
建議可以學術表現自成一段，相關工作經歷一段，運動領
04/04 20:29, 13F
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04/04 20:29, , 14F
導能力則考慮是否刪除。
04/04 20:29, 14F
推
04/04 20:31, , 15F
講重要就好，你不是在申請學校，說明你從這些活動學到啥，
04/04 20:31, 15F
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04/04 20:31, , 16F
足以用在這份工作的
04/04 20:31, 16F
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04/04 20:32, , 17F
講重點....要跳脫所謂自傳範本跟申請學校用的那種自傳思
04/04 20:32, 17F
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04/04 20:32, , 18F
維
04/04 20:32, 18F
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04/04 20:33, , 19F
老闆只要從自傳看到你有什麼能力能夠用在他所欠缺的職位
04/04 20:33, 19F
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04/04 20:33, , 20F
或幫他賺錢的能力而已
04/04 20:33, 20F
推
04/04 20:36, , 21F
英文條列式比較好
04/04 20:36, 21F
所以我應該要把經歷中學到甚麼打出來，做了甚麼是其次囉？ ※ 編輯: a765112223 (140.115.87.146), 04/04/2015 20:48:04 ※ 編輯: a765112223 (140.115.87.146), 04/04/2015 20:48:25
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04/04 22:23, , 22F
太長了，先寫中文自傳吧。
04/04 22:23, 22F
推
04/04 23:43, , 23F
寫重點，人資英文也不一定很好
04/04 23:43, 23F
推
04/05 00:07, , 24F
第一句沒必要。第二段開頭講中英文名字也可以刪掉
04/05 00:07, 24F
推
04/05 00:31, , 25F
第一句感覺還不錯，但是後面需要修很大。ESL學生共通
04/05 00:31, 25F
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04/05 00:31, , 26F
的問題。
04/05 00:31, 26F
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04/05 00:38, , 27F
先不用說別的，妳把自己寫的東西念一遍就大概可以抓
04/05 00:38, 27F
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04/05 00:38, , 28F
出90%的問題在哪了。沒辦法的話就再說。
04/05 00:38, 28F
推
04/05 00:48, , 29F
還有自傳挑重點寫，最好double-space一頁寫完。履歷
04/05 00:48, 29F
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04/05 00:48, , 30F
上有的就不用再重複。
04/05 00:48, 30F
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04/05 00:59, , 31F
履歷建議500字以內就好，太長面試官不看的
04/05 00:59, 31F
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04/05 01:00, , 32F
履歷=>修正為『自傳』
04/05 01:00, 32F
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04/05 09:47, , 33F
請google英文CV跟自傳,會有一堆參考,另外如果你是要投外商
04/05 09:47, 33F
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04/05 09:49, , 34F
儲幹,建議花錢直接找潤稿者幫你潤飾,你的內容很標準的中文
04/05 09:49, 34F
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04/05 09:50, , 35F
思考
04/05 09:50, 35F
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04/05 13:40, , 36F
自傳只要兩句就好
04/05 13:40, 36F
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04/05 13:41, , 37F
Hi my name iz Ma Yingjeou/Lien Shenwen.
04/05 13:41, 37F
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04/05 13:41, , 38F
My fother is Ma Herling/Lien zhan.
04/05 13:41, 38F
推
04/05 19:51, , 39F
沒把握寫很厲害的英文自傳還是就省了吧，看下來很扣分
04/05 19:51, 39F
推
04/06 17:01, , 40F
不如中文履歷寫精彩點
04/06 17:01, 40F
推
04/06 17:05, , 41F
你的英文文法讓我懷疑你的碩士學歷是不是買來的
04/06 17:05, 41F
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