Re: [寫作班] Aliengirl , Christmas

看板ST-English (英文科技寫作)作者fizeau (Gratias ad Opus)時間17年前 (2007/12/24 07:07)推噓0(0推 0噓 0→)

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※ 引述《djnospam (DJ)》之銘言： : : In my view, Christmas, one of the famous foreign holidays, : -> 1. ... one of the most famous .... : or : -> 2. ... a famous ... : 如果只是有名的外國節日之一，那麼用第二個就可以了。(和中文寫作比起來， : 英文比較簡潔) : : is the best opportunity to stimulate the economy and popularize : : Taiwanese culture. : : First, and most importantly, the government : : should take Christmas as Taiwanese official holiday. : -> as a Taiwanese official holiday. : : Although Christmas is an important holiday, workers can't enjoy : Hmm... This part of the sentence isn't wrong, but it raises a question: : Is Christmas "important" in Taiwan? (I personally believe in general : it's not that important. It could be a different story if you're a : Christian, but we're talking about a general statement, not some : rare cases.) : : the whole holiday because Christmas is on the weekday. : -> can't enjoy it because .... : "The whole holiday" technically isn't wrong, but I believe the : objective here it to write "better" and "idiomatic" English -- : fixed/common expressions used by (well-educated) native speakers : of English, not just something barely enough to get by. It goes without saying that native speakers idiomatic or vernacular expressions is a standard to look up to in language learning. But that doesn't mean the freedom of speech/writing be stripped absent justifications. So, why a NATIVE SPEAKER here would say "enjoy it" rather than " enjoy THE WHOLE HOLIDAY" ? First, "it" is a cataphora used to refer to a preceding noun, so "can't enjoy IT" means "can't enjoy the Christmas." Second, can or can't we say "can't enjoy the WHOLE holiday." Why not? If one is unable, due to whatever reasons, to enjoy a holiday as best as he/she can, of course he/she can say it that way to emphasize the degree of disappointment. Last but not least, I think the reason "can't enjoy the whole holiday because Christmas is on the weekday" here looks awkward is because the author had created a false expectation ("THE WHOLE HOLIDAY" gives an illusion that he/she is going to expound more on this issue, such as "some stuck in their heavy workload, tight schedule; some not feel connected to the atmosphere as a Christian, etc.") before abruptly snapping shut his/her sentence with "because Christmas is on the weekday." : : They don't have much : : time to arrange the schedule and have to work (the) next day. : : That is : : the reason why people don't spend money to celebrate the holiday. : Again, this sentence isn't wrong, but you stated "the reason" : (not one of many reasons), which means (or implies) it is the ONLY : reason people don't (do something to) celebrate it. (But we all : know that's not THE reason we don't "celebrate Christmas (by : doing something)" -- it's because most of us are not Christians, : and you pretty much say it in the beginning --> "foreign holiday") : : Second, to attractive foreigners, the government can hold creative : : activities which combine the local accustoms at some scenic spots : : such as Tamsui or Chiufen. It will attract more tourists from all : : over the world to Taiwan. : I personally believe this is THE focal point of your essay, and : you should mention it earlier and write more about it. -- ※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc) ◆ From: 122.120.100.23