Re: [寫作班]第二禮拜題目-英文學習計畫 ....... …
※ 引述《dvlin (Dee)》之銘言：
: ※ 引述《kfsfat (kfsfat)》之銘言：
: : 這是我完成的文章，裡面提到的方法只是寫作時隨便呼?的，僅供參考用
: : 請大家欣賞一下吧，感謝
: : Plan of learning English well
: : English, indeed, it is the most useful languages all over the world. Even
: ^^^^^^^ ^^ ^^^^^^^^^
: 主詞出現兩次了 it刪掉 主詞是單數 所以這邊是language
: (or "one of the most useful languages")
: : though most of us were enforced on studying it since we were in the elementary
: forced to study
: : school, however, we still cannot use it very well. Main factor is we did not
: ^^^^^^^^ ^The
: however 和even though語意重複 刪掉however
: : have enough time to practice it.
: 另外，把"被逼著學"關連到"學得好不好"似乎是有點奇怪的邏輯
: 有人會爭論說，如果你是被逼去學的，你就不會喜歡它，所以當然學不好，
: 但是這跟你的文章無關。建議可以改成:
: "Even though most of us have been studying English since elementary school,
: we still cannot use it very well." (relating 學了多久 and 用得好不好)
: 然後最後一句延續時態 改成"The main factor is we do not..."
: : For this reason, there are two recommendations as follows:
: : First, for reading and writing, I would like to choose reading materials
: ^^^*
: : which I like. Through reading articles, we can be familiar with the usage of
: ^^*
: : vocabularies, grammars, as well as how to write the sentence more clearly.
: vocabulary grammar sentences
: : Meanwhile, choosing a headline as same as the article that you read, and
: ^^^*
: : writing it. At last, asking someone to correct.
: 這兩句沒有主詞 是不完整句子
: * 這篇文章一開始是寫你(作者)的學習計畫,到後面卻越來越像給讀者的指示
: 建議你每一句都用"I..."(前者)或"You..."(後者,)
: : All I mentioned above is based on practicing.
: (下一段就幾乎都是"You..."了)
: : Second, for listening and speaking, both of them can be practiced at the
: : same time.Searching for materials you like, such as movies, music…etc. In your
: ^^^^^^
: "movies, music, etc."
: : free time, you can communicate with friends who also want to practice it.
: : In conclusion, I would like to emphasize again, speaking is loud than
: : action. By practicing it, you can understand what the wrong you spoke,
: ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
: : written, made, after that, correct it. This is the most efficient way
: ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
: "what mistakes you have made"
: : to learn English.
: It is very nice that you tried to use many different types of sentences
: to make your article interesting! But be careful, as your thoughts
: were leaping (跳躍思考), you may lose unity (文章前後的一致性).
: I used to have the same problem. It took a while to get rid of. :)
喔..實在太感謝你的幫忙了...連續幫我改了兩篇像小學生的作文
以後可能會多po文章上來，請你(包含大家)別見怪，
然後另外有一件事請想跟你說一下，因為我想充分利用這個版練習寫作，但是我知道
大家沒有義務一定要幫我改文章，所以如果以後你有看到我po文章，不用急著改，
有控在幫我改，不然我會不好意思勒。
回歸正題..關於你提出來我的錯誤..實在收穫良多阿..不過還是有幾點想提出來跟你討論
1.有關於我文章所使用的enforce 以及你幫我修改的force兩者用法，我查字典好像說
force好像比較像是略即到法律方面的事情，所以我的用法好像比叫ok。不過我最後還是
採用你最後幫我修改的句子，我覺得你講的很有道理。
2.有關於etc用法，好像我的也沒錯，你的也沒錯，不過我明天會去地球村補習，
我在跟老師確認一下吧。
3.你所謂前後文的一致性我了解你想傳達給我的意思，但是我不太懂你說我的文章跳
躍思考，可否請你從我文章中選出一句有跳躍思考的句子嗎，這樣也許我可能可以了解
比較透徹。
感謝你囉....
你是高雄人嗎...若是的話我可以請你喝飲料..哈哈
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※ 編輯: kfsfat 來自: 61.62.186.136 (11/29 04:16)
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